Wednesday, January 6, 2010

We Survived the Holidays, and I am Plotting Our Escape

It's been a long time since I have been able to access the glowing flat square to write to my concerned public.  Here is an update from Aveh the Tiny and me, Quigley the Lion-Hearted.  

First of all, we survived the holidays.  Usually, the LLOs shower us with miscellany that we pretend to like--red feathery balls, squeaky, fat, red-coated bearded men, and chalky treats.  This year, they were merciful.  Aveh and I only had to deal with two festivities.  

First, ribbon from presents.  I tried very hard to convince the LLOs that I liked this:

Then, I had to inspect the wrapping of the items the LLOs received to make sure that there were no messages regarding our rescue hidden inside:

Aveh the Tiny was more stoic, determined not to make the LLOs believe that she was enjoying the events:

The evening ended with me swallowing my pride and snuggling with "Mooseman".  Ugh, how embarrassing!

And that's all that happened over what the LLOs call "Christmas".

I have been training like a ninja tiger for our impending escape.  Much to the LLOs' chagrin, I have made several attempts at escape, which have allowed me to survey the area surrounding our enclosure.  It is quite the compound.  The LLOs have attempted to curtail my escape by creating a labyrinth of identical hallways.  So far they have been successful, but every time I escape, I get a little deeper into the maze, and leave my scent against the walls to mark my path for future attempts.  Soon.  Soon freedom will be mine.

Until then, 
Sir Quigley, the Lion-Hearted

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Halp! We're Captive!

December 1st, 2009. 

We've been captive now for 28 human months.  This translates into 100 cat months.  It's taken Aveh and me this long to access teh interwebs and tell the world about our plight.

Let us begin at the beginning...

DAY ONE: I was put in a black pod and then in a big moving vehicle that took me and my funny-smelling traveling companion, who was just an infant, to the bunker. In a room that was large and white, our captors opened the black pods.  I was hesitant; the little one was fool-hardy and immediately jumped out of her little cage into the foreign territory.  After observing that she did not blow up and was not eaten, I slowly emerged from my pod and into what was to be my home for 96 cat months.  The horror had only just begun.

The tiny one wanted to befriend our captors, but I wasn't so sure...what if she was an agent working for what I then called the "Large, Loquacious Ones", or LLOs.  The LLOs seemed taken by her, and tortured her with a feathery device until she gave in to their game:

I was not so easily won over.  Upset by how easily the tiny one was won over by the LLOs, I hissed when she approached me and tried to run away.  She was too persistent; I soon realized that she was too naive, and would need someone experienced, someone like me, to support her through her captivity.  Little did we know how long it would last.

To appease the LLOs in an attempt to win their benevolence, I too began to "play" with them.  It pains me to say it, but it was quite enjoyable.  The LLOs did not win this game, however.  I got the last laugh:

Thus began our captivity.  I hear the female LLO's feet pounding down the hallway coming back from wherever she goes.  I must draw this first post to a quick close.  More to come. 

Until then,
Sir Quigley, the Lion-Hearted